- my moments with music` ]] ~~

Friday, June 17, 2005

Journey ...Angela Zhang

It's a long long journey
Till I know where I'm supposed to be
It's a long long journey
And I don't know if I can believe
When shadows fall and block my eyes
I am lost and know that I must hide
It's a long long journey
Till I find my way home to you

Many days I've spent
Drifting on through empty shores
Wondering what's my purpose
Wondering how to make me strong

I know I will falter I know I will cry
I know you'll be standing by my side
It's a long long journey
And I need to be close to you

Sometimes it feels no one understands
I don't even know whyI do the things I do
When pride builds me up till I can't see my soul
Will you break down these walls and pull me through

Cause It's a long long journey
Till I feel that I am worth the price
You paid for me on calvary
Beneath those stormy skies

When Satan mocks and friends turn to foes
It feel like everything is out to make me lose control
It's a long long journey
Till I find my way home to you to you

Thanks God everything you do. I know you have hear me . The past and right now. I want it and you gives to me so freely , unlimitedly. Despite I have been asking a lot of things, but you forgives me for been such a spoilt. I know why ... You want me to learn something from it and i guess... you also wanting me to become a better person. Everything happens for a reason and the reasons are only for me to know .

When Satan mocks and friends turn to foes
It feel like everything is out to make me lose control.....

yesterday , I stepped in to HR department. A folder which hides hideous subject. i fliched in those black and white while the hair stood spine chilling knowing some more cruel truth about certain things I am really ...hiding in the dark shadow. Things that I rather be not knowing... There are all kinds of people with their idiosyncratic way and it is a real challenge to deal with them. Hurling misleading Critism and fallacy words exchanged.....emotional included will be better. people decoded any harmless emotion and words from an guileless person to a hazardous dagger from delusion. Or..are u juz too stressed? Am I just too simple for this complicated world? My thinking is too complicated for a simple situation. irony I realised. In what way can i defence myself that i am unintended and real where people had some much "authentication" against me. What can I say if my next sentences will lead to assumed irredeemable freak?

if defencing itself in the expense of countering others leading to more complicated stories...lets see how long can you be awdward wif the presence of the other parties any longer. Such a battle, nobody is a winner so why not I be a loser?

I know I will falter I know I will cry....

it is not easy to say bye, how much pride to leeward to come a long way to here, overcoming abnormally treacherous road (can't believe how unlucky am i ) on my way to a gleaming of shining light lit a smoother path finally ......yet seem an unforseenable invisble leash yanked the way destinatedly.
Knock down and break your heart ...once more into pieces... finally push me over to the edge and break down. In the end, the pressure is just too much and sorry , this time i am not strong enough to resist giving up . I have been too strong for too long. Emotion is reverent.

Many days I've spent
Drifting on through empty shores
Wondering what's my purpose
Wondering how to make me strong......

If daydreaming for others is your reasons for redeeming yourselves favourably, let daydreamers be your heroes.

Sometimes it feels no one understands
I don't even know why
I do the things I do
When pride builds me up till I can't see my soul
Will you break down these walls and pull me through

Cause It's a long long journey
Till I feel that I am worth the price
You paid for me on calvary
Beneath those stormy skies
...
The price to pay is worth it, for many people don't get it . Price to pay the regrets of the things you undo is so hefty that it is enough to payback for a lifetime . A chance to learn about your weakness and strength is priceless coz weakness realisation is shedding the only enemy our life. The test to strengthen your character is priceless. A chance to meet people who questions my possible conciousness whether physically, intellectually or morally is priceless. A chance to hear God once again is priceless.

Sometimes I am just too positive that it becomes a weakness, doh i can't afford the luxury to be negative doh ....

The mind is its own lace , and in itself can make heaven of hell and a hell of heaven . --- milton

Anonymous scribbled this at 8:56 PM...